Visiting Papa

This morning I woke up at 8.50am looking at my phone and thinking. It's so early and I slept at 2 am last night. My grandfather woke up me actually. But then, I remembered why he woke me up. It's so accompany him to my father's "place". So I woke up and had a shower and then went for breakfast with my grandfather. It has been a very long time since the last time I had breakfast with him. So next after that, we went to my father's cemetery. The actual date is this weekend but he wanted me to go there to clean the soil for the candles. So I did all the job. At first a day before I thought it would be a waste of time because I am studying for SPM now. But when I was there, I felt that I was very bad to think like that. Come on~! It's my grandfather asking me and my father's place. What did I think? What a person am I. Aikz. Anyway, I did all the cleaning and all. I did not want to let my grandfather to do a thing including the driving and carrying the umbrella. He is old and he is very weak. When I was cleaning the soil, he cried and told me " This might be my last time coming, I won't have the energy to come here anymore." I felt sad and touched. I told him " No worries, from now on I will do the cleaning and I promise that my family and I will visit my father every year without a miss." After that he was praying and said. " Fah(My father's name), it has been another year again." 11 years now and I am still in the hunger for a father's love. The last time I see my father's face was when I am 6. I looked at my father's picture on the tombstone and my heart was telling me " He is your father and this is how he looks like." I know he will be here with my family and I through everything. Through ups and downs. Tears and joy.

Burning The Midnight Oil

These past few nights, I have been studying night mode as in studying at night until late nights. Studying all the way until 2 - 3am. That's the way I have to be because I can't concentrate in the afternoon. I've tried many times but I can never concentrate in the afternoon. Maybe it's because in the afternoon it's too hot causing me not to concentrate while at night it's so much cooler ^^. SO instead of sleeping at night, now I swap it into the afternoon. I take my nap in the afternoon and study at night.

I don't mind waking up feeling extremely tired because this whole week I've been doing nothing in school but to chase and hunt teachers all around the school. It was considered a good exercise to walk up and down the stairs and looking here and there. Why look for teachers? To fill up my koko stuffs and my leaving cert. Last night I slept bout 3 something and this morning I felt extremely tired I really had no energy to stand up but I still have to push myself to school to finish all those stuffs as today was the last day. I slept in the car all the way to school. Once reached I felt better cause there was people around. Haha. I wanted to come home early today to rest. We are allowed to leave early today because our school had koko day today but I did not have transport home. So I had to wait until 123.30 for my friend. Anyway, today was farewell day, we Form 5's are suppose to have lunch but there was so many people and so little food. How I wish our school had farewell party for Form 5 like other schools. NOT during school hours in SCHOOL UNIFORMS~!

Pimples are flooding my face cause ONCE AGAIN, this is the first time I study so much.
Besides that, throughout all my study life in form 4 and 5, I only started to study in middle August. I was lost COMPLETELY in all the science subjects, add maths, history and even moral. I had to start everything from SCRATCH. Not even 20% of knowledge. But Thank God, God gave me the power to push myself for 3 weeks before the SPM trials getting more Bs and better As and now I am not so tensed up. I pushed myself for 3 weeks at that time, during the trials I was on normal mode, after trials I relaxed and now I am back to pushing mode. Haha, switching like a gear box.

From tomorrow until next tuesday I wont be going to school but I will be skipping for tomorrow only because monday and tuesday are holidays. So these 5 daysa re the days I am gonna push an extra mile. Take care everyone =)

SPM???

Have been busy with SPM studies these days. I can't study in the afternoon. I can only study in the morning and at night. No way I can concentrate in the afternoon. I've tried many times but I just can't. Last time I used to sleep off very early. Latest by 12 or 11++ IF I study. But now, I start to push myself to study and revise harder for these next 3 weeks for SPM. In my life, I've studied most these 2 months. Frankly, I only started to study during the holidays in August. What I mean is that, I only started to STUDY and not to REVISE during that holidays. I felt thankful to God for pushing me to study during that time if not I would ahve to struggle all 5 subjects. Now I only have to struggle one more subject which is my history. The others I've started doing exercises. Praise God for His wonderful deeds. Ok, back to topic, how do I keep myself awake. Here is how it goes. I normally sleep off because I feel lonely and boring but now I've found out that listening to songs ain't a bad idea. I can't concentrate last time when I was studying but now when I do exercises I feel much better listening to songs. I can study whole night long especially on weekends. It's fun to stay up late and study as I can't study in the afternoon. So it's like I am replacing my time.^^ BUT it's not fun staying up late and grow more pimples =.="

Road towards SPM is not stressful actually. Stress only comes when a person thinks too much into something and can't get anything out of it. Like studies, when someone studies so hard and they can't understand a thing or they keep doing exercises and keep making the same mistakes, that's when stress starts to come in. I see many students stressing these few weeks. Stressing on SPM and their studies. I don't understand why people these days like to keep a negative mentality that everytime before they do something, the first word that goes into their minds is FAILURE. Negative thoughts before doing something will not bring success. As for myself, yes me myself too has negative thinking sometimes but not much because I keep telling myself, what is the use of thinking something when I can't get a solution out of it until time comes? Wouldn't it better if I spend the time I have to do something else first and come back to the problem when the suitable time comes. HOW BIG IS THE UNIVERSE??? No one knows but God himself. Are we so free that sometimes we have nothing better to do and to interfere with what God has planned for us? If He has planned for something good to happen, no matter what we do, it will happen and if He plans for something bad to happen, so let it be. Fear not man but God.

TAKE MISTAKE AS A LESSON AND EXPERIENCE AND NOT A SIGN OF FAILURE. IF MISTAKES REPEAT, IT'S NOT THAT YOU ARE NOT GOOD, IT'S JUST THAT YOU ARE LACK OF CONCENTRATION

~Cherish Time~

SPM is really approaching in about 4 weeks time. I am getting close to SPM day by day as time passes. I've got a weird feeling these two days. I've got a feel that I've not done enough for SPM. It's like when SPM is over, I will feel something empty in me. Like there is no more responsibility in studies. And after that, I will feel like I did not do enough in my SPM. I have to cherish my time to study cause this will be my last month to study for SPM. After this one month, I would not have the chance to study for SPM anymore. I wont be studying SPM subjects anymore. Just like band. After the competition, there won't be anymore practices. No more playing the same songs anymore. O.o Life is weird. At one time we are waiting for all of it to finish and at another time we regret for not cherishing the time we had. That's why humans are never satisfied with what they have. no matter what they have, there will still be something for them to complain. In schools, I won't have the chance to study with the same classmates anymore. Tuitions too, I have 2 more weeks of tuitions to go and after this I won't be meeting the same teachers anymore. Life is slow moving when we are undergoing it but when we look back into the past we feel that time flew. ~Cherish Time~

Catching up with my chemistry these few days. The input is very slow because I am required to memorize a lot and my memorizing capacity is very low. Lower than anything in the world. I am a slow in memorizing. That somehow made me a forgetful person sometimes. Haha. Well, at least I am improving on chemical equations but I will still need to do more on equations. I can't find other equation questions anywhere else. 3 chapters to master (Electrochemistry, Acids and Bases, Salts). After mastering this, I will start my past year papers. ^^

Exam Results - UPDATED

Got back some papers these two days. Very regret on my mod maths and add maths marks. If it's not for the careless mistakes, I should have gotten what I aim for. But now, I get lower marks. Very big waste. Why didn't I do properly. Aiyo, press wrong numbers in the calculator, putting wrong signs and even writing down wrong numbers. All these silly mistakes ate all my marks up. Physics was another one. few more marks for an A and I lost it in the easiest questions in paper 3. If it were to me me who doesn't know how to answer the questions then it's alright, but now the faults goes to my carelessness that made me lost almost everything. So near yet so far. Why? this might be a lesson from God to tell me not to be so careless in SPM. Haha. Anyhow, I am quite satisfied with all my results as all shown improvements. However, it's still not enough to please my mum and my bro. Aikz. Spm is coming soon and I've gotta push all my marks up. Aim for SPM? Hopefully 8A1s. May God Bless Me In All I Do.

UPDATES

Heheh, I am back again for more results update. Not to show off my results cause they are not good but to just blog it up so that I can read back next time. Haha. My final results are OKEY and not disappointing BUT I am still unsatisfied with the careless mistakes done. Not only one subject with careless mistakes but all the subjects that I got B for. ALL~! If it were not to be those mistakes, I would have gotten much better results. AIKZ. Anyway, these results this time is not bad either. I improved from an average of 50+ to 70 this time. This exam taught me one thing and make me realized another thing. The thing is that, it taught me not go be so careless in SPM, and it made me realized that I am not stupid after all. Haha. I CAN STUDY~!!! WOO~!!! I am not as stupid as patrick. HAHA. Not to say clever, but just an average teen. YEAH~! Quite happy with my improvements but still not up to level yet. Need to push a little more to achieve my aims. TWO subjects I am sure not to get A for is biology and history. Aikz~!

All the best to all PMR candidates, my friends, Do your best and God will do the rest. =)

Holidays Mania

hehe. Hows holidays everyone? My holidays are great cause my cousin is back here in Ipoh. Enjoyed a lot chatting with him, playing with him and sleeping late these few nights. Tonight will a very fun night. We are gonna order MCD midnight. Haha. He asked me to SG next year to future my studies. Of course I would love to do so butta there are financial problems regarding that matter. Studying cost is not the problem but the problems goes to the living cost.

Just finished watching moonlight resonance yesterday. Hehe. I watch from DVDs cause I don't have astro on demand and I am too lazy to buffer it from the internet. So I watch everything from the DVDs. I started watching on the last day of the broadcast of moonlight resonance episode 40, I was at episode 1. Hehe. That was during trials. I watched that show all the while during trials until yesterday. Very nice show. Mixed emotions in different part of the show. Some funny parts, some angry parts, some touching parts. Haha. I like it the Carl starts to joke and also the parts when they argue and the HO MA settles everything with all her points and facts and can even shut the lawyer's mouth. Haha. I like heart of greed last year. This year, it would be moonlight resonance. Hopefully there is part 3 next year. Haha. The director is one great director to figure out all the plots and suspens in the movie.

I got my new handphone already few days ago on wednesday. K810i. Very nice phone. I like its cybershot and its xenon flash. It can make moving objects steady. Very nice and very satisfying. ACtually I wanted to get k850i(the phone Raymond Lam used in moonlight resonance) but it was over my budget so too bad. Throughout my life, I've been using quite a number of phones. Let's see if I can dig out everything and list it down. Ahem~ Let's start wiht
- Motorola (Very bulky Model)/Alcatel(STD 5)
- Nokia 3210 (STD 6)
- Nokia 3610 (STD 6 after UPSR Results)
- Nokia 3250/ Sony Ericsson W710i ( Form 4)
- Nokia N80 IE (Form 5)
- Sony Ercisson K810i (Current)


SPM is coming very soon. SPM is round the corner now. Few days from now I will start to countdown for SPM. All the best to all SPM candidates 2008. Gambateh~!

My favourite in MOONLIGHT RESONANCE